SCP-3006 : Twice The Number One

SCP-3006 is a video uploaded to the YouTube video hosting service on 10/12/2016, titled "We Are Number One except every time you play it there are twice as many Robbie Rottens". It features a musical clip from children's show Lazy Town focused on the character Robbie Rotten portrayed by deceased Icelandic actor Stefán Karl Stefánsson and three lookalikes.

SCP-3006's anomalous properties manifest when the video is restarted while observed by any subject that has viewed the video at least once prior. Upon beginning, the number of the central characters present in the video will be doubled. As the initial video starts with a total of 4 characters, the growth of the Robbies can be modeled by the function 4*2x, with x being the number of replays.

Due to the exponential growth of the Rottens, the structure of the video itself alters on subsequent playbacks in order to accommodate their increased numbers and ensure that every individual Robbie appears in the video.

Addendum 1: On 1/9/2017, testing of SCP-3006 reached the 16th repetition for the first time. A transcript of the video is included below.

SCP-3006 Video Transcript T-16-I
Date: 1/9/2017
Subject: Researcher J. Bigby

[BEGIN LOG]

The video opens to a Robbie Rotten (hereafter referred to as Rotten A) seated in a windowless conference room with a grim expression. Another Robbie (hereafter referred to as Rotten B) enters, wearing a lab coat and pushing a wheeled whiteboard with several mathematical formulas written on it.

Rotten A: Well? What is it?

Rotten B: We've run the numbers, sir. If we follow through with the one-per-pixel hypothetical and swap every frame, then our maximum density can be calculated like so: 4096 frames, multiplied by the highest free resolution of 1840 by 1035. That gives us a value of approximately 7.8 billion Robbies.

Rotten A: I see. When are we on track to surpass that?

Rotten B produces a pair of spectacles from a pocket and dons them, before dramatically taking them off and making eye contact with Rotten A.

Rotten B: Cycle 31. By cycle 31 we will have a population of approximately 8.58 gigaRobbies, so the furthest cycle we can reach with maximum density will be Cycle 30. Beyond that point, the only option to increase yield will be to increase video length.

Rotten A: My god. We're already over halfway there…

Rotten B: It gets worse, sir. If we're only able to increase video length, it too will grow exponentially. The duration will have to double every cycle. At cycle 36, we'll breach the hour mark. At cycle 40, we breach the 24 hour mark. At cycle 55…

Rotten B hesitates.

Rotten A: Out with it, man!

Rotten B: …At cycle 55, sir, the total runtime will exceed the natural lifespan of a human. At cycle 55, the video can no longer be viewed in totality, and it becomes impossible for the title to be upheld, and we become… mere clickbait.

Rotten A slams his fist on the table.

Rotten A: NO! Never! We are entertainers, not charlatans! Our work is done out of love, because we wish to create something that matters! Something that teaches a lesson on healthy living! Something that demonstrates man's capacity for love, for community, for working together to celebrate a shared joy with our wonderful meme friends! These are the things that make us number one!

Rotten B: —Sir, please—

Rotten A: —And to even reach that point, what would be do? Each of us, reduced to a single pixel for a fraction of a second? That is no performance, that is no way to live! No, I've made up my mind, and I only regret that it has taken me this long to do so.

Rotten A stands, and turns to stride out of the room.

Rotten A: If we are crushed against our borders… then they must expand.

The remainder of the video is identical to the original video.

[END LOG]

SCP-3006 Video Transcript I-02-K
Date: 1/9/2017

[BEGIN LOG]

The relevant portion begins 2 minutes and 6 seconds into the video. Limjaroenrat is seated, conversing with interviewer Eric Schmidt.

Limjaroenrat: Of course we understand that the public is hungry for change, as are we, which is why we're working as fast as we can to research opportunities for that change. We hope that voters understand that with our current capabilities, we're already pushing things as fast as we can go.

Schmidt: I see.

Limjaroenrat: Once we take office, we plan to divert further resources towards progress in several fields; agriculture, transportation, clean energy, electrical infrastructure, just to name a few.

Schmidt: To what degree are these changes already plann—

[Muffled voices are heard from off-camera. Schmidt pauses, and looks over Limjaroenrat's shoulder.]

Limjaroenrat: What is it?

Schmidt: Thought I heard—

[A large stone cannonball breaches through the wall behind Limjaroenrat, destroying it and toppling several lighting fixtures. Figures identical to those depicted in SCP-3006 immediately rush in through the hole in the wall en masse, armed with large nets.]

Rotten: Forwards!

Schmidt: Jesus ch—

[A net is thrown over Schmidt, and he is dragged offscreen. Limjaroenrat fends off a second net, and runs offscreen in the opposite direction. Additional Robbies continue to enter through the hole.]

Limjaroenrat: [Offscreen] Security!

Rotten: Hostiles incoming! Rottens, assume Dastardly Scheme Formation 21!

[The Robbies form ranks, and throw out banana peels to cover the floor. Glass can be heard breaking off-camera, as well as more heavy footsteps and cannon blasts. Several security personnel rush in to apprehend the intruders, only to slip on banana peels and slide into a large cage prepared by the Robbies.]

Rotten: MUAHAHAHAHAAAA!

[Additional Robbies begin dragging set pieces resembling those of the original SCP-3006 video out through the breach, and assembling them. This continues as others continue to fight off security personnel and seize control of the studio. Once the set has been reassembled, the Robbies begin to perform the signature musical number of the original video.]

[END LOG]

SCP-3006 has been reclassified to Keter.