SCP-4852 : Site-19 Goes South For The Winter!

Got any sixes?

Nah, go fish.

This game sucks.

I'm trying to enjoy my break. No one's keeping you here.

Yeah and nobody's keeping me from throttling you either. Doesn't mean I'm gonna do it.

Difference is that you don't want to be here.

I mean, yeah. What else am I gonna do?

You have a job, y'know. Why don't you go do that?

Could you three shut up? I'm trying to finish this design. It's going to be an auto-thaumic prop-

Fetch.

[BRIGHT throws part of his lunch at CROW, who growls at him before biting into it.]

MIC 2

Jean.

Tilda.

Something to drink?

Only water.

[MOOSE fills AKTUS' cup from a pitcher.]

Well, I won last time, so I'll take white.

Yeah, I'll take black this time around. Like my lungs, hah!

[AKTUS breaks into a coughing fit.]

Jesus, you okay?

Y-yes, nothing I'm not used to. Though I have to say, the floor shaking is a new symptom. Maybe vertigo - nausea?

… I thought that was just me.

BOTH MICS

[All site microphones record a loud rumbling and seismic sensors detect subterranean movement. The building begins to shake. Fourteen seconds following this, all cameras lose connectivity.]

«END LOG»

Addendum 4852.2

DISTRESS SIGNAL LOG

T-MINUS 167 MINUTES 18 SECONDS

«BEGIN LOG»

Signal in, what's your status? Talk to me.

You're not gonna like it.

Insurgency? GOC?

Neither, for once.

Well, spit it out then.

Uh, Research Wing A4 is gone.

Gone? Is it destroyed?

It's, uh, it's running away.

… What?

It's just sprinting outta here. Ditched the rest of the facility.

Is this a joke? You know you could be termin-

It grew big ol' chicken legs, tore itself out of the ground, and it's heading twenty-seven degrees south by southwest at… our drones are putting it at 13 miles per hour. Transferring data now.

[S19-COMMAND transfers satellite data packet to OVERWATCH-COMMAND.]

Oh shit it does have legs.

Yeah. Looks like fucking Baba Ya- hold on, we're getting a signal from inside the wing.

How many people were in there? I need name-

GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!

Oh Christ.

Dr. Crow, I assure you, we're doing our best-

You ever seen a dog in a moving car? Three words: slip and slide, bud! I'm getting the hell outta here before I lose my lunch.

Dr. Crow, that's dereliction of duty.

The moment I'm out of this ungodly place I'm going to vomit on you.

In Background:
S19-BRIGHT: YEAH SHOOT ME YOU BITCH SEE WHAT HAPPENS FUCKING TRY M-

Ah fuc-

[S19-CROW's signal cuts off.]

Do you think we should extract them?

Nah, they'll be fine. Focus on figuring out a way to stop Baba Yaga.

We should probably stop calling it Baba Yaga.

Probably.

«END LOG»

Addendum 4852.3

DISTRESS SIGNAL LOG

T-MINUS 99 MINUTES, 55 SECONDS

«BEGIN LOG»

Hello? Hello? Come in?! Did Clef break the fuck—

Oh hel- Tom? That you?

It's Bright, you dolt.

You sound an awful lot like Tom.

And why do you think that is?

[Silence for 4 seconds.]

Oh.

Yeah. Don't worry, I'm putting his body to better use than he ever did. Slob.

Signal in, what's going on in there? Why'd the signal go out earlier?

Clef tried to fucking shoot me. Actually I have to give credit where it's due, he shot me. Really nailed me, it was great. Props.

You're not like… hurt, though, right?

I'm immortal, not invulnerable. Getting shot still fucking hurts. Anyway, you guys need to get me the fuck out here. Ben's lost it, he keeps telling us how we could end this right now if we pulled a Battle of Hoth. I don't even know what that means!

Okay, does he-

You never watched Star Wars? Seriously?

Believe it or not, I have better things to do than watch campy sci-fi.

Okay, that's really not important right now. Bright, can you tell where you are?

I'm in the break room.

I meant geographical- why are you in the break room?

What the hell am I supposed to do? Everyone's in their headquarters.

What? Okay, explain from the start.

After Clef fucking shot me, Kondraki raised hell while someone got me to a new body. Well, they tried, I just took theirs instead, faster. When I came back to, Crow told me that half the researchers had taken up with Ben and holed up in the office block and the other half are supporting Clef because I guess their hate for Ben outweighs their fear of Alto.

It's been like an hour holy shit. How did you guys already go Lord of the Flies?

These people are crazy. I think I saw someone about to be sacrificed.

Oh, like Luke in Return of the Jedi. Oh wait, you'd only get that if you've watched Star Wars.

Wow.

Can you get ahold of Crow? Where are you two?

Uh, yeah, he's right here. We're in the mech lab, he's trying to- YOU MOTHERFUCKER!

In Background:
S19-CROW: Ah nuts.

COME BACK HERE YOU SON OF A BITCH YOU'RE NOT LEAVING ME IN THIS LOONY BI-

Uh, sorry, only room for one! I'll come back for you, maybe!

[The sound of an explosion is heard, followed by fading engine noises.]

What on Earth is going in there?

He finally got it working.

What working?

The fucking egg walker.

«END LOG»

Immediately following this, SCP-4852's advance was momentarily halted by an explosion punching a hole in its exterior. An object exited this hole at high velocity, crashing into a nearby thicket. Agents discovered Dr. Crow in a modified version of his Type-2 Oblong Walker, having sustained only minor injuries. After being extracted from the wreckage and purging on the paramedics, he was returned to the main portion of Site-19 for medical treatment.

Addendum 4852.4

AUDIO LOG 2

T-MINUS 58 MINUTES, 03 SECONDS

«BEGIN LOG»

MIC 1

-thinking we attack as soon as this bowlegged rooster stumbles over a tree or something.

Do we have to attack? I'm sure command is figuring a way to take this thing down as we spe-

Well, Kathy, you think Clef is right in the head? I bet you he's planning how to take us out right now.

Why's that?

I just said so! Because he's insane! He's a violent, paranoid maniac! Which is why we need to kill him before he does anything!

Well, I don't want to fight my coworkers!

They're not coworkers anymore, Kathy. They're competition. We have to prioritize our own survival! We cannot let that psychopath kill us all!

[Scattered cheering.]

We need to move quick. I bet he's mobilizing his people right now, the sick fuck.

MIC 2

Anyone got a four?

Nah, go fish.

«END LOG»

Addendum 4852.5

CONTAINMENT ATTEMPTS

CONTAINMENT ATTEMPTS

Addendum 4852.6

DISTRESS SIGNAL LOG

T-MINUS 19 MINUTES, 02 SECONDS

«BEGIN LOG»

Can you read me?

Loud and clear, what's happening?

Long version or short version?

Uh, let's do medium.

Ben and Alto are in the shittiest Mexican standoff ever.

How th-

They need another person.

What?

A Mexican standoff needs three people, it's just a regular standoff if you only have two.

Uh, no, I'm pretty sure it's still a Mexican standoff. You just need all parties to not be able to wi-

Oh my god how do you people still have jobs.

If you have only two parties, one can still win by just shooting faste-

Buddy, I'm looking at the definition on my phone right no-

YOU HAD SIGNAL THIS WHOLE TIME?!

Hey, I was trying to conserve battery, jeez.

Shut up and tell me what's going on.

[Gunshot.]

Okay well Ben shot Alto.

Jesu-

[Gunshot.]

Oh wait he missed the first time. Nailed him this time though, good shot.

Can you defuse the situation?

Uh, I don't think they'll be exactly happy to see me.

Why's that?

Well, uh, they're fighting because, uh, before the place ran for it, we were playing cards. With money. And, uh, when the power ran out, someone, um, stole the cash on the table. As it were.

Jesus Christ, did you steal their money?

Holy shit.

Look, look, I was jus-

[External cameras show SCP-4852-A rocking and bucking before squatting low, placing the base of the facility 5m from the ground. The building begins to violently shake, throwing people across the floor.]

Oh bo-

«SIGNAL LOST»

Addendum 4852.7

INCIDENT REPORT

UNEXPLAINED EVENT REPORT

59 KM SW of Site-19, TN.

Concluded.

11:49 PM (local time) January 18, 2013

Keneq

SCP-4852-A ceased movement and squatted down. Over the following 12 minutes, the facility produced 5 metal ellipsoids, each roughly 3m in diameter and 4m in height, and dropped them to the ground in a small pile. Each object was found to be constructed of riveted steel with a Foundation seal emblazoned on top.

Following the laying of the fifth object, SCP-4852-A stood up, moved several meters forward, squatted again, and demanifested its legs, dropping the facility to the ground. No further anomalous activity recorded.

Upon disassembly, each metal object was found to contain a full set of blueprints for Site-19.

Addendum 4852.8

POST ACTION DEBRIEFS

T-PLUS 85 MINUTES, 34 SECONDS

«BEGIN LOG»

So where were you during all of this, Director?

In Tilda's office.

Doing?

Drinking wine. Chess. Cheese.

And you never saw fit to intervene? Try to establish order?

Everyone at this godforsaken site is deranged. They probably would've tried to draw and quarter me. Besides, I had money riding on this game.

… I see. And do you have any idea what could have caused SCP-4852?

Oh, is that what it's being called? Frankly, I don't think it should be an SCP file, most of your addenda will just end up being boring transcripts. But, no, I have no idea what definitively caused the event.

You make it sound like you have a good guess.

You ever heard of the term cuckoo's nest?

Insane asylum, right?

That's right. You guys put the most anomalous, craziest people on the payroll into the same building housing the most magic objects in the world.

I'm not sure I follow.

[AKTUS takes an inhale from his oxygen mask.]

Why, it was just bringing the cuckoos to nest.

«END LOG»

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